Wednesday, November 26, 2008

The Dirty Dozen...The TURKEY Edition!

It's Almost Done!

Despite what our friends at the Four-Letter Word say, this is the week...that TRULY is rivalry week. Alabama/Auburn, Georgia/Georgia Tech, Florida/Florida State, Oklahoma/Oklahoma State and Texas/Texas A&M are all RIVALRIES that truly define what college footbal is about. I guess, because of the BCS implications, the biggest of the games is the Battle of Oklahoma, but as always, expect the crazy this week, it always happens.

Last Week: 7-2, though I got the regulation final in the Crapple Cup, but since I didn't pick the winner, I lose. Overall: 67-17, not bad for a rookie, eh?

The Dozen:

1. Alabama (They are still undefeated. I'm not totally sold that they will run the table, unfortunately, it won't be this week when they lose. This Week: Alabama 27, Auburn 13)

2. Florida (Well, if you want to argue who the best team this year is, these are the guys that I would take ((I can't believe I'm saying this))it must be the thought of Tryptophan. This Week: Florida 41, FSU 27)

3. Oklahoma (They have a steak...get it...in how this all plays out too. Even though they lost to Texas, I think they are better. They better watch out this week, they play the Gundy's. This Week: Oklahoma 37, Oklahoma State 34)

4. Texas (They argue too much. They gave a game to Texas Tech and I'm not sure how they have made it to this level. This Week: Texas 38, Texas A&M 17)

5. USC (Again, not convinced ((boy I sound really negative this week don't I?)). Heck, they may not even win there conference. They too play a rivalry game, just not an in-state one. This Week: USC 24, Notre Dame 13)

6. Utah (I finally know the name of the coach: Kyle Whittingham. Hooray for me! Nice to see them in the BCS Party, it sucks that they will be a sacraficial((sp?)) Turkey for someone in a bowl. This Week: The Season is over)

7. State Penn (Joe Pa had his surgery, nobody has committed a felonius act on campus lately, all must be well in the Great State of Pennsylvania. This Week: The Season is over, they go to the Rose Bowl...and there was much rejoicing!)

8. Texas Tech (Well, reality finally came crashing in. I didn't think they'd win last week, but I didn't think they'd get embarrassed like that either. This Week: Texas Tech 112, Baylor 17)

9. Boise State (Well, they survived, but alas they won't make the BCS, though they probably are worthy compared to several other teams ((see USC)). But, it was a good season none the less. This Week: Boise State 31, Fresno State 21)

10. Ohio State (I just don't get this team, never have. But they play in the 10, where mediocrity rules. This Week: Season over, playing in the Crap One Bowl probably vs. Georgia)

11. Okie State (We just like the fightin' Mike Gundy's, we really do. Plus, they aren't a bad team, though this may drop them out of the Dozen for the season. This Week: See #3)

12. Ball State (Congratulations for running the table. You are worthy of a Top 10, but sadly, this will be as close as you get. Maybe David Letterman will create a Bowl Game for you. This Week: Season over, waiting for a bowl invite)

The Turkey Gizzards:

5. Notre Dame (Can someone please explain how they lose to Syracuse at home? Just when you think these guys might be returning to respectability, they tank. Will Charlie the Hut survive this? Does anyone care? This Week: USC kills them)

4. Meesh-a-gain (Wow, how the mighty fall and fall and then fall again. They are pretty bad and may not be good for awhile. This Week: Season is over mercifully)

3. Schmoo (Even the Schmoo had more success than these guys. June Jones is probably wishing it was June instead of November right now. This Week: Southern Miss. 31, Schmoo 14)

2. Washington State (Just because Washington gave you the game doesn't move you out of here. This is still one of the worst teams in the history of NCAA Division 1 football. This Week: Hawaii 28, Washed State 13)

1. Washington (God they suck. Tyrone Willingham's legacy here unfortunately will not be a good one. Yes, they may have made history...as the worst team in NCAA Football. This Week: Cali-forn-i-a 34, Washington 10)


HoHoHo...to all a...oh...wrong holiday. Everyone enjoy a Happy Turkey! They taste better.

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