OSG Predicts: The Return of the Dirty Dozen and the Bottom of the Barrel!!!!!!!

Yes! We're back and we're badder than ever. It's everyone's favorite column during the season, the one that nobody actually reads (though we hope that will change). The one thing that separates OSG Sports from everyone else. Not only do we choose the best in college football....we celebrate the worst. And no, we didn't do a pre-season poll, because we hate them. They are stupid and don't mean a thing.

With that in mind, coming off of a 125-38 season of picks from last year, we'll re-introduce ourselves to those of you who may be new to this. We give you our introduction (Thanks YouTube):

So, in the words of Casey Kasem, "It's on with the Countdown"

This Weeks Dirty Dozen:

1) Alabama 1-0. Only by virtue of the fact that they haven't done anything to lose this yet. Mark Ingram's status may be an issue as the season progresses. This Week: Alabama 24, Penn St. 10

Wilkie: Alabama is so loaded at running back they can afford to let Ingram sit out. Penn State won't be getting any southern hospitality. Alabama 31, Penn St. 7
Nelson: Concur... no issues for Alabama at home... Who scheduled this one, JoePa...?
31-13

2) Boise St. 1-0. We think it is really funny how everyone south of Virginia has their panties in a wad about these guys. "They don't play anybody" "They'd never survive the SEC". Sure. Right. Do you really want to play them? This Week: Bye Week

Wilkie: Stop with the "they don't play anyone." B.S. Did Boise State travel cross country to play Virginia Tech..... yes. Did the Broncos come back to win..... yes. It's not Boise State's fault they have great talent yet play in a mid-major conference.
Nelson: Despite TBH's rather vocal protestations, I actually had the Va Tech game as a blowout. Didn't happen that way, but a win nonetheless...
They go 2-0 with a ByeWeek win...

3) Ohio State 1-0. They are always here. There is no reason they won't stay...at least for awhile. They are still the same team they've been for the past 4 years, which is good, not great. This Week: Ohio St. 27, Miami 21

Wilkie: Ohio State always seems to be in perpetual cruise control. Rarely takes a step back but doesn't seem to ramp it up. The Buckeyes will handle the Hurricanes but it will be close. Ohio State 21, Miami 17
Nelson: I don't even think it'll be that close... 21-10

4) TCU 1-0. Another BCS buster and another team nobody else wants any part of. (See Oregon St.). Plus Andy Dalton gives us plenty of Roadhouse jokes to use. They will run the table and be a BCS factor. Trust us. This Week: TCU 41, Tenn. Tech 10

Wilkie: TCU is for real. The Frogs have some players. Tennessee Tech will get punished. TCU 45, Tennessee Tech 3.
Nelson: Tennessee Tech gets the early lead, and all that does is piss off our man, Dalton... 52-6 in a stat game...

5) Texas 1-0. We aren't really sold on these guys yet. Yeah, we know they beat Rice Krispies last week, but who doesn't? October will be the determining factor as to how good they are. This Week: Texas 31, Wyoming 7

Wilkie: Texas looked good against Rice but their is something missing there. Phil is right, October will determine if the 'Horns can Hook'em. Texas 35, Wyoming 7
Nelson: Wyoming is dealing with a lot after the passing of LB Ruben Narcisse. They don't want to be in Austin. They'd rather be home... 45-0 Texas

6) Oregon 1-0. Yeah, I know we have them higher than most, but not by much. They are the best of the Pac 10/12 this year, for whatever that is worth. This Week: Oregon 34, Tennessee 24

Wilkie: Oregon will score points, lots of them. The Ducks are the leader of the PAC 10/12. I'm willing to bet an inspired Tennessee team scares the bejesus out of the Ducks. Oregon 21, Tennessee 20
Nelson: Can Tennessee really score any points...??? Oregon 27-10...

7) Nebraska 1-0. Gut feeling says they won't be here later in the year, but they are right now. Plus we just like saying Bo Pelini. They played Western Ky. last week, which qualifies as a practice game. This Week: Nebraska 27, Idaho 7 Potato's

Wilkie: These seem to be your grandfather's Huskers. Taylor Martinez, or as they call him in Lincoln "T-Magic", looks like the second coming of Turner Gill, Steve Taylor or insert your favorite Tom Osbourne era quarterback. Nebraska will mow down the Potatoes. Nebraska 37, Idaho 7
Nelson: Yeah, I gotta go Blowout City here... Nebraska 38-6...

8) Iowa 1-0. We've never totally figured out why the Big 10/12 teams are always rated high early in the year. They rarely finish there. These guys traditionally start strong and fade. No reason to believe any different right now. This Week: Iowa 18, Iowa State 16.

Wilkie: I know Iowa is at home but I'm going with Iowa State in this Cy-Hawk showdown. Iowa State 17, Iowa 10
Nelson: Wilkie is smoking something and not sharing... 20-9 Iowa...

9) Oklahoma 1-0. Sure, they struggled last week. It was less of a surprise to us than it was everyone else. They again, land here, because they are Oklahoma not necessarily because they are good enough. We have our doubts. This Week: FSU 31, Oklahoma 27 UPSET ALERT!!! (Yeah Jon, I picked it!)

Wilkie: I'm right there with you Phil, I like Florida State in this game. The Seminole offense looked great. FSU 45, Oklahoma 30
Nelson: I'm not picking it... Oklahoma wins and Chrstian Ponder leans in on another tackle with his throwing shoulder... 37-31 Boomer Sooner...
Where's Billy Sims...???

10) Florida 1-0. We watched some of last weeks wretched performance. Ewww! We are beginning to have doubts if they are as good as they've been. We considered putting them in the bottom of the barrel because of it but decided not to. They better be better this week. This Week: Florida 21, South Fla. 17

Wilkie: Florida better not play like a junior high team against the Bulls. There is a tendency to pick South Florida in this one but I'm to chicken. Florida 24, South Florida 21 (Urban Meyer 4 melt downs)
Nelson: How can you tell when Meyer melts down, anyway...??? He's such an emotional guy... Florida wins, but not by much... 24-21...

11) Florida State 1-0. Yeah, they looked pretty good last week, so why not. We know at some point they will implode, but for now...what the heck. This Week: See #9

Wilkie: I don't see this FSU team imploding. Jimbo Fisher has Nick Saban like control in Tallahassee.See #9
Nelson: The new head coach for LSU will have them more ready than normal, but not this week...

12) Miami 1-0. This is only because I refuse to put 3 Big 10/12 teams in here right now. The Sugar Canes are improved, but it remains to be seen just how much. Guess we'll find out this week...and no, the schedule doesn't get any easier. This Week: See #3

Wilkie: Miami isn't loading themselves on cupcakes. I'm interested to see how Jacory Harris handles the hostile atmosphere at the horseshoe. See #3
Nelson: Jacory Harris will not handle himself well in the Horsehoe... see above...

And now, our favorite part. The worst of the worst. The stinker of stinkers. The crappy of the crappiest. We give you.....THE BOTTOM OF THE BARREL!! On with the countdown:

5) Memphis 0-1. We still laugh about Fred Smith trying to buy these guys a spot in the Big East. Hahahahaha! What's even funnier? Fred's boy Cannon is the starting QB. Hmmm. Wonder how that happened? This Week: East Carolina 36, Memphis 10

Wilkie: Fred Smith's money is no good in Greenville, N.C. East Carolina 45, Memphis 0
Nelson: Yeah, that... Where's Tommy West...???

4) Rice Krispies 0-1. Yeah, we know, they are always here. And they probably will stay for awhile. Not all football in Texas is good you know. This Week: Rice 1, North Texas 0

Wilkie: The Krispies might actually get a road win in Denton, TX. Rice 3 North Texas 2
Nelson: North Texas 4, Rice 3... UNT actually scored on Clemson...

3) Western Kentucky 0-1 They are 0-21 in their last 21 games. That's never a good sign. Don't expect that to change for awhile. This Week: Kentucky 34, WKU 17

Wilkie: We are removing the 'toppers from WKU's nickname because the Hills haven't topped anyone in years. Kentucky 38, WKU 0
Nelson: Good one, Wilkie... I like the neighborhood you're in... 45-0...

2) Washington State 0-1 Can some please explain how Paul Wulff still has a job? 3 Wins in 2 seasons and he's still employed? Hello...Washington State? Do you want to suck in perpetuity? This Week: Montana St. 28, Wash St. 16

Wilkie: Lose to Montana State..... Ok I'm in Montana State 31, Wazzou 21
Nelson: Three for three... 28-17 Montana State

1) New Mexico 0-1 Ok, here is a question. Who is the worst coach in Division 1 football? Paul Wulff or Mike Locksley? We are amazed either is employed right now. We think Locksley has incriminating pictures of the New Mexico administration. This Week: Texas Tech 51, New Mexico 3

Wilkie: I think New Mexico and Wazzou should play in the Toilet Bowl in December and the loser gets the trophy and their coach fired. Texas Tech 65, New Mexico 0

Nelson: Taylor Potts should send a thank you note to Locksley when this game is over... 412-0... Cumberland won't have anything to worry about after this one...